STAR WARS EPISODE III: REVENGE OF THE SITH

Cast: Ewan McGregor, Hayden Christensen, Natalie Portman, Ian McDiarmid, Samuel L. Jackson...

Director: George Lucas

Writer: George Lucas



Review Date: 08/16/05
Written By: suj
the grade: 1/10

THE PLOT_________________
The third and final installment in the Star Wars prequel trilogy (the sixth Star Wars movie overall). After three years of fighting in the Clone Wars, Anakin Skywalker concludes his journey towards the Dark Side of the Force, putting his friendship with Obi Wan Kenobi and his marriage at risk.

THE REVIEW_________________

It has been four months since Star Wars Episode III released itself onto the world and it has been four months since I watched this particular film. I recall upon that first and only viewing saying something like “It’s a good movie” or some kind of flattering variation of that said quote. But the more I think about it that proclamation was a bit premature, it was a quick assumption with no thinking behind it. Now, that time has passed and my thoughts aptly collected, my true sentiments can now be told: The film utterly sucked. Those who say it’s the best of all Star Wars flicks are lying or in some manner sucking the cock of George Lucas. You know that it sucks when the opening scroll has the word “WAR!” with a fucking exclamation point and you can’t forget the laughable cry of anguish spouted out from the newly constructed Lord Vader upon hearing the demise of his beautiful wife. It’s just all fucking ridicules. I’ve been had, owned, punk’d. The ten dollars and the some odd two hours of time that were stripped from me, I can no longer get back. I despise this movie with passion. I loved Star Wars and this film just poisoned the aura of the franchise. It's tainted without the hope of being fixed. It’s awful. I should give this movie a solid negative out of ten, but the fact Natalie Portman is in it (even though she doesn’t do much) I gave it a generous one. I’m not that bad of a guy, but I do fucking hate this movie.

I can go on and on about the suckfest that is this movie in more detail, but I lack both the time and energy to bombard this gathering of words with unenthusiastic quips and lashes of discontent. Instead I have included this lovely sequence of what growing grass looks like, because watching grass grow proved to be way more interesting than sitting though Star Wars Episode III.