THE LORD OF THE RINGS:
THE RETURN OF THE KING
Cast: Elijah Wood, Sean Astin, Viggo Mortensen, Ian McKellen, Orlando Bloom, Andy Serkis...
Director: Peter Jackson
Writer: J.R.R. Tolkien (story) Peter Jackson, Philippa Boyens, Frances Walsh
Review Date: 12/21/03
Written By: Suj
Rating: 4.5/10
THE PLOT:
While Frodo & Sam continue to approach Mount Doom to destroy the One Ring, unaware of the path Gollum is leading them, the former Fellowship aid Rohan & Gondor in a great battle in the Pelennor Fields, Minas Tirith and the Black Gates as Sauron wages his last war against Middle-Earth.
THE REVIEW:
What can I say about Peter Jackson's third installment of The Lord of the Rings entitled 'The Return of the King' or even the whole franchise itself that has not yet been said? Wait I think I got something, has anybody called them the most OVERRATED movies to have ever graced audiences world wide? By that unkind remark you now know that I did not enjoy 'Return of the King.'
Return of the Kings is superbly repetitive: the heroes are out numbered and must defend a little castle against gigantic villains. This premise repeats itself throughout and what’s up with that whole Father-who-lost-his-fav-son-and hates-his-other-son subplot, was that really necessary for the film? it didn't really do much for the movie. The damn 4-5 endings...what the fuck was that all about? Seriously did they really need to add all those, should have just ended it when Aragon was crowed king and save the rest for sure to be extended special directors cut special collectors special box set anniversary edition DVD. Also did people notice a sudden appearance of giant eagles which saved both the army during the final battle and carried Frodo and Sam off Mount Doom...what the fuck?...think about it for a moment we see Gandalf riding these eagles, So why didn't anyone think to summon these enormous eagles a long ass time ago and just hitch a ride to Mt Doom? This eagle shit is the stupidest thing ever put on the big screen its such cop-out. Now I know some of the people reading this are saying "dumb fuck, its all part of the book?" I never read the books and never will, so the only thing knew about ROTK and the others was stuff people told me beforehand and also lets get something straight...did I pay 10 bucks to read a book in a darken theater? NO! I payed 10 bucks to watch a MOVIE.
Critics worldwide have praised these films (ROTK in particular) as cinematic masterpieces some even go as far as calling the third installment the best picture of the year...whoa! back up there a bit "best picture of the year" you got to be shitting me. Some also state that Peter Jackson should win best director in the coming Oscars. Sure he's a great film maker I’m not doubting that I have mucho respect for the man, but the dude had millions upon millions of dollars and years to make these three films. With that much time and money it doesn't take a rocket science to craft together The Lord of the Rings. So critics are awarding this film with the best picture/best director nods for the simplest fact that it was endowed with special effects galore, tested it audience's well being for a grueling three hours and 45 minutes, repeated itself over and over, and was just plain out boring. What has the film world come to? Hold on, it wasn't entirely boring some of the effects were great and i did love the opening (the whole Gollum flashback.) hence I gave the film a 4.5 not a 0.
I really don't understand why this movie is being praised as a masterpiece and the greatest film ever made. The ability to create digital characters of mass amounts and have your audience sit for 3+ hours, doesn't mean the film is all that. Seriously do you think ROTK is better than Orson Welles 'Citizen Kane' or hell even Fincher's 'Fight Club' I really don't think so. Those two films alone have done so much more with so much less, maybe I’m biased? but if your truly a fan of ROTK for its plot, characters, and the end all be all fine, but this cookie ain't for me.
In the end it really doesn't matter what i say because all you LOTR fans have made up their minds and dubbed ROTK 'the best film ever'. I just don't see and or understand why theses films are uber popular and prasied by all. Strip the three films to their bare bones and what do you got? a "story" about some hairy-footed Hobbit trying to destroy a ring that was given to him by an inattentive father figure. The films are hopelessly indulged with repetitive battle scenes and the painfully overwrought homoerotic overtones between the pairs of Hobbits which results in a cinematic experience more likely to bring on sleep than to evoke any emotion other than apathy. I just don't get the appeal of these films.
Finally in the whole film geek community there are only two kinds of people: the ones who love LOTR and the ones who despise it, I for one fall into the latter of the two.
Director: Peter Jackson
Writer: J.R.R. Tolkien (story) Peter Jackson, Philippa Boyens, Frances Walsh
Review Date: 12/21/03
Written By: Suj
Rating: 4.5/10
THE PLOT:
While Frodo & Sam continue to approach Mount Doom to destroy the One Ring, unaware of the path Gollum is leading them, the former Fellowship aid Rohan & Gondor in a great battle in the Pelennor Fields, Minas Tirith and the Black Gates as Sauron wages his last war against Middle-Earth.
THE REVIEW:
What can I say about Peter Jackson's third installment of The Lord of the Rings entitled 'The Return of the King' or even the whole franchise itself that has not yet been said? Wait I think I got something, has anybody called them the most OVERRATED movies to have ever graced audiences world wide? By that unkind remark you now know that I did not enjoy 'Return of the King.'
Return of the Kings is superbly repetitive: the heroes are out numbered and must defend a little castle against gigantic villains. This premise repeats itself throughout and what’s up with that whole Father-who-lost-his-fav-son-and hates-his-other-son subplot, was that really necessary for the film? it didn't really do much for the movie. The damn 4-5 endings...what the fuck was that all about? Seriously did they really need to add all those, should have just ended it when Aragon was crowed king and save the rest for sure to be extended special directors cut special collectors special box set anniversary edition DVD. Also did people notice a sudden appearance of giant eagles which saved both the army during the final battle and carried Frodo and Sam off Mount Doom...what the fuck?...think about it for a moment we see Gandalf riding these eagles, So why didn't anyone think to summon these enormous eagles a long ass time ago and just hitch a ride to Mt Doom? This eagle shit is the stupidest thing ever put on the big screen its such cop-out. Now I know some of the people reading this are saying "dumb fuck, its all part of the book?" I never read the books and never will, so the only thing knew about ROTK and the others was stuff people told me beforehand and also lets get something straight...did I pay 10 bucks to read a book in a darken theater? NO! I payed 10 bucks to watch a MOVIE.
Critics worldwide have praised these films (ROTK in particular) as cinematic masterpieces some even go as far as calling the third installment the best picture of the year...whoa! back up there a bit "best picture of the year" you got to be shitting me. Some also state that Peter Jackson should win best director in the coming Oscars. Sure he's a great film maker I’m not doubting that I have mucho respect for the man, but the dude had millions upon millions of dollars and years to make these three films. With that much time and money it doesn't take a rocket science to craft together The Lord of the Rings. So critics are awarding this film with the best picture/best director nods for the simplest fact that it was endowed with special effects galore, tested it audience's well being for a grueling three hours and 45 minutes, repeated itself over and over, and was just plain out boring. What has the film world come to? Hold on, it wasn't entirely boring some of the effects were great and i did love the opening (the whole Gollum flashback.) hence I gave the film a 4.5 not a 0.
I really don't understand why this movie is being praised as a masterpiece and the greatest film ever made. The ability to create digital characters of mass amounts and have your audience sit for 3+ hours, doesn't mean the film is all that. Seriously do you think ROTK is better than Orson Welles 'Citizen Kane' or hell even Fincher's 'Fight Club' I really don't think so. Those two films alone have done so much more with so much less, maybe I’m biased? but if your truly a fan of ROTK for its plot, characters, and the end all be all fine, but this cookie ain't for me.
In the end it really doesn't matter what i say because all you LOTR fans have made up their minds and dubbed ROTK 'the best film ever'. I just don't see and or understand why theses films are uber popular and prasied by all. Strip the three films to their bare bones and what do you got? a "story" about some hairy-footed Hobbit trying to destroy a ring that was given to him by an inattentive father figure. The films are hopelessly indulged with repetitive battle scenes and the painfully overwrought homoerotic overtones between the pairs of Hobbits which results in a cinematic experience more likely to bring on sleep than to evoke any emotion other than apathy. I just don't get the appeal of these films.
Finally in the whole film geek community there are only two kinds of people: the ones who love LOTR and the ones who despise it, I for one fall into the latter of the two.
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